Amazon is going to revoke my membership for sure. First, I wrote to Jeff Bezos asking him why his Amazon logo looks like an erect penis, arching toward a vaginal “O” (I still await a response, Jeff). Then I attempted to play provocateur on the Amazon website, which featured an absurd webcam that tosses …
Man, Donald Trump must suck at movie trivia. He clearly doesn’t remember much of The Godfather II. The series has provided reams of classic quotes in film lore, including making offers that cannot be refused. In the sequel, Michael Corleone gave one as equally memorable: “My father taught me many things here. He taught …
Dear dictionary people, First off, thank you. You’re not like those punk bitches at Oxford Dictionary, who succumb to pressure annually to add new official words, which is like giving someone who can’t ride a bike your car keys; you’re over-arming. Particularly now, when the world’s last remaining superpower is led by a man …
A special factslap edition, particularly for presidents from shithole frontal lobes: Haiti is the second oldest independent nation in the Western Hemisphere, after the United States. The place where Hitler killed himself is now a children’s playground. Jackie Chan trains his stuntmen and pays their medical bills out of pocket. Cacao plants are …
The Pew Research Center just released a study that must awaken newspaperpeople in cold sweats, or urine: 81% of Americans get their news from a screen — either online outlets or social media (a putrid redundancy) sites. That doesn’t even include TV. Of the stragglers left over who get their news from papers or …
It’s either a sign of Guillero del Toro’s genius or the lackluster slate of films (or both, of course) that Shape of Water has become the film du jour in Hollywood’s pre-Oscar hysteria. The odd fairy tale has already racked up seven Golden Globe nominations, a raft of other nods, and it’s expected to …
There’s a certain anticipation — and dread — that comes with every Oscar season. On the one hand, the Academy Awards are a clear demonstration of film as art. On the other, that art often sucks. But this year will mark a seismic shift, at least in tenor, to the annual self congratulations: Expect …
I’m not so much a gadget freak as a gadget mutant alien virus. My technology jones runs deep. I have four outdated cellular phones, a half dozen MP3 players and four digital cameras. My middle name could be iSucker. I even like the ads for electronic stores. When I lived at home, I would …
First: How is it that Donald Trump has not responded to rapper Eminem’s scathing video beat down of the administration, in which he told his fans that if they were supporters of the Pumpkin-in-Chief, they should stop following buying his music? It was a rare non-response (which has become as much a tea leaf …
What happened last night in Vegas is unspeakable. So of course Sean Hannity spoke. “This is no time to politicize the tragedy,” he belched on Fox. What insanity this? He then went on a rant against the “liberal media,” who would surely try to make this a political hot potato. Do you not already …
The Hollywood Bowles 